Routines: a shield for children's emotional security

If your child could talk like an adult, he'd probably tell you, "Nothing reassures me more than a well-planned day!" But since he's still a bit young to explain this to you, it's up to you to read between the lines... and in this article. Children's routines and emotional security are fundamental pillars of their well-being. They create a reassuring framework, enabling them to feel safe and to approach the world with confidence.

Routines, often perceived as boring for us adults, are in fact essential anchors for toddlers. They establish a reassuring framework that enables them to feel secure and to approach the world with confidence. But how does it really work? Let's explore it with humor, concrete examples and, above all, solid scientific research!

Why are routines so important for children's emotions?

Routines play a key role in children's emotional security, providing them with stable cues that soothe their emotions. Young children experience many emotions throughout the day. However, they are not yet mature enough to understand and regulate these emotions. Routines provide them with a stable, predictable framework that helps reduce anxiety and manage their emotions.

According to research conducted by Harvard University's Centre on the Developing Child, children who follow regular routines develop better emotional skills, as these routines provide them with a structured framework in which they feel secure. Emotional security is an essential pillar in building their self-confidence, enabling them to navigate their daily environment serenely and better apprehend future challenges (Fostering empathy ch...).

A study published in the Journal of Applied Developmental Psychology has revealed that children with regular routines at home show higher levels of emotional well-being and stress regulation. The study showed that children exposed to stable routines were less likely to develop anxiety disorders and were better able to handle new or stressful situations.

Routines and their role in emotional regulation

Regular routines help children to better manage their emotions and reinforce their emotional security. The role of routines goes beyond simply organizing the day. They are also a powerful tool for helping children manage their emotions. By providing regular points of reference, routines structure time in a predictable way and help children to better manage their emotions throughout the day.

Further research, published in the Journal of Developmental and Behavioral Pediatrics, shows that children who follow regular routines, particularly at bedtime, are more likely to enjoy better sleep quality, which is crucial for emotional regulation. Good sleep, reinforced by a soothing routine, enables children to better manage the emotional challenges of the next day.

For example, the transition from playtime to mealtime can be stressful for a child. A well-established routine, in which the child knows that mealtime is always followed by a moment of relaxation or a calm activity, helps to calm the anxiety linked to this transition. The child gradually learns to anticipate these moments, which reduces emotional outbursts.

What to do: create and use visual routines

Visual routines are an excellent way of reinforcing children's emotional security. They help structure the day in a fun, predictable way, soothing their emotions. To help your child find his way through the day and better manage his emotions, you can make a visual timetable together. This becomes a fun tool for structuring the day while reassuring the child. Here are several ways of doing this:

1. Make a timetable with photos of your child
   Take photos of your child in different situations: eating, playing, brushing his teeth, napping, etc. Stick these photos on a board, and use an arrow or figurine to indicate each activity as the day progresses. Stick these photos on a board, and use an arrow or figurine to indicate each activity as the day progresses. This allows the child to visualize what's going to happen, reinforcing emotional security.
2. Use images cut out from catalogs or magazines
   If you don't have any photos to hand, cut out images from magazines that illustrate the different stages of the day. These can be images of children or everyday objects (a bed for a nap, a plate for a meal, etc.). The idea is to make the day predictable and fun to follow.
3. Use a commercial visual timetable
   If you're short of time, there are a number of ready-made visual timetables available for purchase, with cards to hang and move around. They enable children to follow the day and anticipate transitions independently.

Household routines: a guide to managing emotions

Here are some concrete examples of routines to help your child manage his emotions throughout the day:

• Morning routine: As soon as you wake up, a well-defined routine can include getting dressed, breakfast, then a quiet playtime before leaving for school or nursery. This helps avoid chaotic mornings and reduces separation stress. Children know what to expect, so the transition from sleep to wakefulness is smooth and controlled.
• Transitions routine (play-meal, play-nap): Transitions can be a particularly difficult time for young children, especially when moving from a fun activity to an obligatory task, such as eating or napping. A transition routine can include a quiet time before mealtime or a song before naptime, allowing the child to make the emotional link between the different stages of the day.
• Bedtime routine: This moment is often emotionally charged. After an active day, a soothing bedtime ritual (bath, story, cuddle) is essential to calm the child and help him relax before sleep. In this way, sleep becomes a smooth transition, rather than a struggle against accumulated emotions.

Research by the Sleep Foundation shows that a consistent, repeated bedtime routine not only helps improve sleep quality, but also reduces aggressive behavior and tantrums in young children.

Children with special needs and the importance of routines

For children with special needs (such as those with autism, ADHD or anxiety disorders), routines are even more important. These children may have difficulty dealing with change and the unexpected, which can lead to emotional outbursts. Routines create a structured framework that helps them anticipate transitions and feel in control of their environment.

According to a study published in Autism Research, autistic children who follow daily routines benefit from a significant reduction in anxious behavior and emotional outbursts. Researchers found that these children develop a better ability to cope with change when gradually introduced to well-established routines.

For these children, it's essential to use visual aids (such as pictograms or charts) that enable them to visualize each stage of the day. This helps them to better understand what is expected of them and to mentally prepare for transitions, thus reducing anxiety and stress.

Routines: a springboard to autonomy

As well as reinforcing emotional security, routines play a crucial role in the acquisition of autonomy. When tasks are repeated daily in a predictable way, children learn to perform them on their own. Over time, he will no longer need the parent's constant intervention, which boosts his self-confidence.

A study from the University of Rochester has shown that children who follow structured routines are more likely to develop time management and responsibility management skills, which promotes academic success and independence in adolescence.

Practical examples for parents

Here are some additional ideas for setting up routines adapted to your child's needs and development:

• Active morning: After breakfast, devote some time to a physical activity (such as dancing or playing in the garden) to help channel energy. Then introduce a quiet activity, such as a puzzle or drawing, to prepare for mealtime.
• Emotional learning before bedtime: Before bedtime, set aside a few minutes to talk about the highlights of the day and the emotions felt. You can also include a gratitude ritual by asking your child to tell you one thing he liked about his day. This helps them identify and express their emotions, while bringing the day to a positive close.

Conclusion: structured days for happy, independent children

Establishing routines helps guarantee children's emotional security, enabling them to grow up with confidence. Routines are not shackles, but gifts you give your child to help them feel secure in an often unpredictable world. Not only do they help to soothe emotions, they also foster autonomy and the ability to manage life's transitions. Whether for typically developing children or those with special needs, routines create an emotional stability that helps them navigate with confidence.

At Play and Grow Togetherwe offer a variety of activities adapted to young children, designed to encourage their emotional development and provide moments of calm and creativity, such as before bedtime or while the parent is cooking. These activity sheets are invaluable tools to help parents accompany their children through key moments of the day, while reinforcing their emotional well-being. Because a child who feels secure today is a confident adult tomorrow!